Yo ho ho and a bottle of.....

.... blood.

And assorted knee gunk.

Up to 700ml so far.

No wonder I'm feeling a bit woozy....

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Feeling a bit of a drip

So it wasn't the meniscus after all

Whatever it was that was fycking up my knee got cut out anyway.

I suppose I'll find out what it was at some stage....


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A day in Freiburg with an iPhone

"Eeeee" she said

It looks offal. I mean - awful"

Definitely the former - fried tripe.

Which is cows' stomach.

Quite excellent.

We had it a lot when I was a kid.

You didn't earn a lot in the New Zealand Army in the 1950s and 60s even as a Senior NCO and it was roast lamb or beef on Sundays and leftovers during the week until it ran out and then casseroles, liver, kidneys, oxtail or tripe.

As Keith Richards said (referring to HP sauce):

"It's as difficult to kick as heroin"

I'd go along with that.

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The road less travelled....

Out on the bike today, zipping around the vineyards over to Oppenheim which is an easy-ish 22km with a few decent gradients.

Between Zornheim and Mommenheim, there's the most seductive concreted farm road.

It drops away from 230m ASL to 130m ASL in about 700 metres and I'm tanking down there, touching 45kmh and looking at the vineyard shelter in my immediate future.

Do I cut right onto the rough track or keep going on the concrete road?

No choice.

Full speed ahead..

But I couldn't quite see where it went so I braked a bit.

And a bit more.

And a LOT more.

I came to a stop just before the road ceases to exist and a track does a sharp hairpin to the right.

What's ahead?

Oh, a sheer 10 metre drop and vineyard posts and wires about 20 metres away neatly aligned to cushion the fall.

Bloody hell....

They're kidding, right? Right...?

.


If you want to vote in the state elections in North Rhein-Westfalia and you're visually impaired, you can request free assistance from the BSVNRW. Which is the Organisation for the Blind and Partially Sighted.

Except it's not free.

In a telecoms market where free domestic calls have become the norm, these idiots have the BALLS to provide a premium number for folks who are probably economically marginalised as well as having been dealt the cards of life from a crooked deck.

And I BET that they'll get shunted through a MAZE of a menu to keep the cash register going "kaCHING"

This stuff really pisses me off.

(In case you hadn't noticed....)

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Just imagine...

having to eat something like this.

It's the Kentucky Fried Chicken's "Double Down" sandwich.

2 slices each of plastic cheese and bacon between 2 crumbed and deep fried chicken breasts

Not forgetting the dollop of "The Colonel's Secret Sauce", of course.

Needless to say, it doesn't look QUITE this vile in the adverts once the food stylists are finished with it, but there's no getting away from the fact that it's 25% of my recommended calorific intake and with more salt than I should probably eat in a week.

I'd do it like this:

1 chicken breast, sliced horizontally and then flattened.

Dip in a beaten egg and then dredge in fresh breadcrumbs you've made from wholemeal bread.

Fry in olive oil.

In the meantime:

Grill some pancetta and drain on kitchen towels, thinly slice some buffalo mozarella and toss some baby salad greens in a vinaigrette made of olive oil and aceto balsamico.

Assemble as a sandwich with a good dusting of freshly ground pepper.

You don't get the large fries and the bucket of Coke, but then again, it doesn't cost $9.....

As easy as falling off a Logue

I'll admit to being a bit of a fan of Popdose.

Actually, I've liked Jeff Giles' writing and musical taste since his classic Jefitoblog and his Editor-in-Chief-ship at Popdose seems to keep the troops in line.

Except for this bird.

Ann C. Logue.

In real life, she teaches finance at the University of Illinois and writes for Business Week, Barron's and the Chicago Tribune.

At Popdose, she does "Numberscruncher".

She writes stuff like this.

Europe is in a state of uncertainty right now, so Poland’s sorrow adds to the stresses on the continent. A unified currency is a new experiment in the world, and we don’t know how it will work out. The Euro zone, which is those nations that use the euro, agreed to a €30 billion bailout of Greece last week. Poland is not on the euro yet, so it is not participating in the bailout. The plane crash and the Greek crash may delay Poland’s currency conversion, but if the euro is still around in a few years, then Poland will be on it.

 

I have absolutely NO idea which target audience she's aiming at.

 

I also have NO idea what she's trying to say. 

I'll tell you what, though - I'll definitely have some of whatever it is she's smoking.....

Man admits having sex with horse and donkey

Requesting he be released on bail, defence counsel Amar Mehta said: "The defendant does not have a stable address."

Probably a good thing, too

A SQL query walks into a bar.

He approaches two tables and asks "Mind if I join you?"

Tables: "Normally, we'd say yes, but we're just here for the view."

Not sure about "The New JBs"...

... but I can help then out with an old one....

Mouths of babes and stuff

An 8/9/10 (?) year old philosophises:

If you fall off a 500 ft cliff ,the first 499 are fun the last one not so good.

HT David Slack and progeny

Now I know....

.....why My Mate The Professor has no hair.

Over the years, he's torn it all out in exasperation.

I suffered irreparable follicle damage yesterday, too.

It went like this:

Albert Lee's playing at the Rex in Lorsch, MMTP is doing what professors do at University far away, but his missus says she'll tag along.

She's very sweet, really quite clued up and if we hadn't worked together years ago I'd never have met MMTP, which gets her no end of brownie points.

But sometimes she's a bit of a challenge.

Call up Ms. MMTP on Monday and get her voice mail

"I'm back in the office on February 4"

Last month or next year?

We arrange to meet at a restaurant we've been to before in Lorsch at 6:30.

6:30

6:40

6:45

Cellphone rings.

"WHERE were we meeting...?"

So she decides to take the doggy bag to the car before the concert.

Off we traipse.

"This doesn't look right" she says after we've been walking for about 5 minutes " I'm sure I parked outside whatsitsname"

Ask someone where whatitsname is.

Turn around, walk back to the restaurant and there it is.

Opposite direction from our original trek and you can almost SEE it from the restaurant.

And after the concert, we're walking back to the car and she's muttering "Now, where's my key? I KNOW it was in here somewhere. This bag's the fashion equivalent of the Bermuda Triangle..."

The concert?

Excellent as always.

And of course it's of great comfort to see people on stage who are older than oneself (or if they're not, they look it..)

New album out, for once with a decent artwork and all covers - everything from John Hiatt to Ray Charles via Steely Dan, with a bit of Carole King and Little Feat thrown in for good measure.

Played

Don't - Elvis's version

although I've become more attached to David Gilmour's reading.

Rad Gumbo - here's Little Feat's version although anything in the post-Lowell George era doesn't do a lot for me.

Proof here, with a 35 year old live "Dixie Chicken".

Didn't do "Man of Constant Sorrow", so here's Rod's version (pushing 40 years, as we speak) ad how could he without a mandolin.

And that was fascinating, too.
Just a single Stratocaster, which Gerry Hogan gets to use when Albert's on piano. None of this prima donna "Ineedadifferentguitarforeverysong" stuff.

And "Can your Grandpa rock and roll like this?"

Albert can.

And did you know that he played on Marc Benno's "Lost in Austin"

Me neither, until someone in the "get stuff signed" queue told me.

Quite appropriate, although Ms MMTP was more "Lost in Lorsch"

Don't think anyone's written it yet.....

Tags: Rex, Lorsch, Albert Lee, Hogan's Heroes, Like This, Elvis Presley, David Gilmour, ittle Feat, Lowell George, Rod Stewart, Stratocaster, Marc Benno

Fucking Hell

Wish I'd had the idea

Can't you just hear it?

"I'll have a Fucking beer, a Fucking shandy and a packet of salt and vinegar crisps"

Landlord calls out "Whose bus is that parked outside? Fucker"

"Don't call me "Fucker", ya prick":

I was going to buy this for the horses....

...but it doesn't look very stable